The List

There is this list of things keeping me alive. When it’s bad, like it is now… when I can’t face it like I can’t now… I start running through the list. It’s the normal stuff, really: people I care about, things left undone, not wanting to hurt my family, feeling selfish for even letting the thought of no longer existing feel warm and attractive.

It’s also things like secrets, or things that I would prefer to tell my family. I’ve covered these things with the immediate people… but I feel like I can’t just up and die. There’s so much preparation, it’s just easier to live.


What do you think?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s